Bad News

Many of you have heard me talk about our dog, Lucy. She is our one and only pet and will remain the only child for sometime. You can check back to an earlier blog to hear how we came to have Lucy in our life.

For some time now I have been putting off Lucy's heart worm testing and starting her on preventative. She is up to date on all vaccines, and such, but that extra step I was slow to take. When I first got her I was in college and like most college students didn't have the money to do the extra, just the basics. Then the next phase of life, I moved across the country and didn't see getting Lucy tested as a priority. I had paying rent, buying gas to get to work, and food as priorities.

A few weeks ago a friend of mine found a stray pup that I desperately wanted to keep. But I rationalized the decision to death and decided that there were extra steps that needed to be taken with Lucy's health that we had put off, that we needed to get done before we took on ANOTHER animal. I would rather give Lucy 100% rather than giving two dogs 50%. By far one of the hardest but most responsible decisions I have had to make recently.

This is the stray my girlfriend found, she was known as Ellie or Puppy and she needs a home.

So without wasting anymore time, we made Lucy an appointment to get her heart worm tested so she could begin preventive medications. I knew once the Vet called us back that she had bad news. (Insert Meltdown #1) I didn't know all the details about heart worms, just enough to scare the crap out of me. I knew it was something that could kill her. And I knew that it was VERY painful for her to have treatment to get rid of them. That was enough knowledge for me, maybe too much.

The vet told me that Lucy's test came back positive. I burst into tears. (You may think this is ridiculous, but I am her care taker, I am responsible for her, she depends on me) At that moment, I felt like I had failed her. If only I would have made it a priority. I didn't, and now she will be subjected to pain, a shorter life, who knows what else.

The good news (whatever that means at this point) is that Lucy is young at 2.5 years of age and is in good heath other than this. So the vet things she is a great candidate for treatment. The treatment has begun. I ended up leaving the vet with some additional tests being done, an antibiotic, and an appointment for Lucy's first round of treatment. For the first test they made me sign a paper saying if she had a reaction to the treatment, that I approve any emergency actions to be taken including: CPR!!!!!!!!!!! (Insert Meltdown #2) She will be able to come home and will be boarded at the Vet's office during the wedding for the second step in her treatment. So points of stress the week of the wedding: 1. boarding my dog 2. leaving her for a very painful treatment 3. oh that thing called our WEDDING!!!!!

The thing that I normally am fretting over and I I haven't thought once about is the cost of this treatment. I am a worrier when it comes to money. But I told Justin, I would rather NOT go on a honeymoon, sell my ring, sell our TV, get a second job, whatever it takes to take care of the Luc. He assured me that we would do whatever we needed to do t take care of her and get her well. So that was a sigh of relief.

I'm sure you can tell how I'm feeling. I am borderline distraught. I feel like the worst parent in the world. This is something that could have been prevented. Something I could have protected her from. And now she has to endure pain for something I didn't do.

Sorry for the long post, but I have a lot on my mind. I'll keep you updated on Lucy's progress throughout the next few months.